where do i go from here?

my relatives keep saying how there are nice boys in church groups and that i should join them.
also, they keep saying that i'm a social butterfly and i would have no trouble making friends with new people just like that.

the thing is, i don't think i can become someone's friend so easily like that because i don't trust them until i've known them for awhile. coworkers are coworkers, and roommates are roommates. i am not about to march over to the youth group and be all "hi-how-are-you-let's-be-friends" just because my grandmother thinks they're a nice group of kids.

bleargh.

i'm a closet social pariah. leave me be. i'm not attracted to any one and i don't plan to be on the prowl for a while. just because my cousins are slowly getting married off doesn't mean it's time i have a steady.

anyshoo.
other things are quite lovely and the lack of my posts are an evidence of this. nothing seems to be a problem in my life until the deadline of my paper.

even the pastor says "out of sight, out of mind"