talked to mom on msn.
we're now on good terms again.

she still wants me to quit taiko: reason being she doesn't want to see me suffer. of course being me i casually brush it off saying "hey! i'm not going there for him. for crying out loud, i'm your daughter. i fucking flew three thousand miles by myself at the age of 9 away from my own family to america. i can survive one heartbreak! who do you think i am mom? i'm so much stronger than this!!" and she goes on to say do a good job and everything. i go as far as to invite her to invitationals of course, and it being in ucla, of course mom and ruby are coming....

so all buffed from mom-talk, i start getting my clothes out to pack for the coming weekend and i briefly sit down to browse facebook.

WELL FUCK. i can't even go to my friends' facebook profiles without running into HER fucking wall posts. STOP IT. i DON'T want to hold my breath EVERY FUCKING TIME I TRY TO ENJOY LIFE. YOU INVADE MY FUCKING LOVE LIFE, MY REAL LIFE, AND MY SUBCONSCIOUS THROUGH THE MEANS OF NIGHTMARES. JUST STOP IT! I DON'T WANT TO REGRET NOT JUST JUMPING OFF GILMAN PARKING STRUCTURE EVERYTIME I EVEN HEAR THE MENTION OF YOUR NAME OR SEEING YOUR DUMB FACE!!!

*huff huff huff*

i can't throw a real screaming bitch fit cus there are people sleeping.

AGHASDlkfja;lsdkfj;ksadljf;aksjdf;kasjd

annnnd i need to start studying for physics at least. i'm skipping out on history cus i haven't done the reading nor have i gone to the freakin' lectures. oh well. i have bigger fish to fry, like that job interview tomorrow. omfg why are there so many damn obstacles in my life???